At 6 years old, my Saturday mornings consisted of spam-and-egg breakfasts and Saturday Morning Cartoons. My favorites were Rocko’s Modern [Read More]
horny
Happy Birthday Booty, Part III
Now with Persian Princess behind me, me in the middle, and Fifty Shades in front of me, we lay down and face one another, as we continue to talk [Read More]
Happy Birthday Booty, Part II
Continuing to roll on Molly and stroll down Holly….wood Boulevard (yeah, ya like that?!), I unleash a fury of nonstop questions as Fifty [Read More]
Happy Birthday Booty, Part I
In true happy-birthday fashion, I organized a slutty slumber party Friday night to ring in my 26th year of being a living, breathing, fucking [Read More]
The Libidinous Laundry Blues
I’m still sweating, panting, and palpitating as I type this, not because it’s 85 degrees right now in my apartment and not even [Read More]
How To Fuck A Billionaire
Driving down to Newport Beach from Beach Blender's place, I down as much water and Ibuprofen as I can (careful not to accidentally take the [Read More]
The Law of Attraction
Today I was inspired by a 16-year-old girl with a crush on a boy to GO AHEAD AND TELL M&M HOW I FEEEEEEL! Just go over there, knock on the [Read More]
Who Run The World?
I have no idea how I managed to head out last night, but champion out onto the mean streets of Hollywood Blvd. I did God dammit! I ended up out [Read More]
Slaps and Tickles
After last night’s failed attempts at solidifying a decent piece of ass, I decided to take up David on a mid-afternoon date at the W for [Read More]
The Dougie and The Douche
I had planned on staying in last night to watch Sex and The City and paint my nails. Miss Mirage hit me up around 7 though demanding that, if I [Read More]
Connect With Me!
Hit Me Up On Social Media: