While stuck in LA traffic (as usual) this morning, I contemplated all the men I’ve dated, had my eye on, seen, wanted to fuck, etc. this year so far and I’ve taken inventory of a plethora of BALD men. I’m not talking OLD, bald mother fuckers though, just the bic-bald ones, the men who understand that they’re baldING and don’t want the world to know that they’re going through completely typical physical changes that coincide with aging. It’s cool, boys, I dig it. Mirage said I should hook up with a bald guy and have him rub KY all over his head then have him rub it on my vagina. Sunny said that actually feels funny. I think it sounds hilaaaaaaaaaaarious and can’t wait to try.